blackbeauty05
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Name: Alexandra
Country: United States
State: Michigan
Metro: Detroit
Birthday: 7/21/1987
Gender: Female


Interests: Music, Dancing, Cooking, Singing, And my walk with Christ! I would like to be interested in YOUR walk with him as well! Do YOU know him?
Expertise: I think the thing that I am the best at is loving people just almost unconditionally..I'm not there yet but I'm workin on it! I mean that's what Jesus was and is all about...lovin each other no matter what. I have many friends and please believe that I love them true and I love them hard, because I believe friends are what God sends you to make through your life. So if you need someone to love you or to just be your friend or both you know who to call. peace. 100
Occupation: Student
Industry: Medical


Message: message meEmail: email me
Website: visit my website
AIM: lilsishawtty2105
Yahoo: lilsistashawtty2105


Member Since: 12/10/2004

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Wednesday, March 01, 2006

Currently Listening
Ray!: Original Motion Picture Soundtrack
By Ray Charles
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D-R-A-M-A! All this frickin drama around me! Everywhere i turn there is drama! Ok! First, my two niggas wanna go and try to shoot at each other over some stupid ish! Well, that didnt happen and u aint got no idea how happy I am! Then tha fact that all these negroes in my life aint got they ish together is NOT helpin me none.

My family. There will always be somethin for me to stress about with my family. Look. Imma set tha world strait real quick (lol) Everything that goes on is not my business, and even if it is...i REALLY dont care anymore. I love my family! I love all yall! But all the stuff thats floatin around...drop it. Its all crap. My family and my love for them is WAY  more important than all tha drama!

Now, tha negroes. I apologize to all my white friends reading this, but this is some ish! Negroe #1: Tall, and beautiful. Sweet and hard. And tha negroe dont know what tha heck he wants! M-m-m. But ladies let me tell you, he is tha FINEST man I have seen in a looong time! lol

Negroe #2: Aww! This Cat aint nuthin truly, but it's sho nuf hard for me to let go of him! He just makes me feel so dang GOOD! So I think Imma just hold on to him for a lil bit longer...hehehe...

NEGROE #3: This fella here! I think we are destined to be together and tha strange thing is I believe he does too...but why do negroes wanna play games?! He is pullin all tha right strings to keep pullin me along and I am sho nuf tied to tha end of that twisted string! Imma keep thinkin about him and wait it out jus a little bit more.

If yall got anything to say that may help me out..let ya gurl hear it. I love all yall and I need some prayers. I need to be prayin alot more...I'm kinda slippin...well maybe not kinda. I need to get back to tha beginning.  Holla at ya gurl! paz.100


Monday, January 30, 2006

Currently Listening
Get Lifted
By John Legend
^^**Stay With You**^^
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Hey yall! GUESS WHO'S BACK?! BACK AGAIN?! ALLIE'S BACK!! TELL YOUR FRIENDS!!     Yea its been over a frickin month since I got on this thing! But now I'm here! O by the way your gurl got a myspace 2! But I aint gon tell yall about it till I fix it up! LOL! *sigh* Drama, Drama, Drama. I mean so much has been goin up and down in my life I dont even know where to start. What do yall wanna know?

Aight, So, I am officially a whore! Well, maybe its not that bad, but..well listen. So I am in dealings with 2 dudes...and the other 2 are in progress...to me this is just too much...what am I a boy-crazy elementary girl?! No not really. But all these niggas popped up at once! But ay! I aint even complainin! LOL

Well, here's to my best friend in tha whole round world! Greg! I love that kid! I also wanna give some major loves to my ppls: Tiffany, Landa, KC, Tima, Willie, Bridgette, Kendra, Kole, Kim, Tisha, Julia, and Lamore! Yall know I love u!

SO since last month I have been tried. God has been tryin to show me some things but for the longest I wasnt quite sure what it was he was tryin to show me. To make a very long story short, He was tellin me to praise Him. All the time...when I feel like it and especially when I dont feel like it. Just thank Him...it surprises me how saying the words "Thank  you Jesus" can alter so much in ones life. I've had to learn to stop talking so much and just give all things that concern me and those things that DONT concern me over to Him. Once again Im surprised by how much peace God gives me everyday! My desire IS to get closer to God daily. My goal is to hunger for it tha way I used to...I need to get back to that point. The point where I could lay prostrate in His presence covered in my blame and feel His hands cleansing me, His promises bringing forth new life in me, His presence filling me. I  miss that. **Lord, help me to get back to that point. I miss you...but you already knew that.**

Things are looking up for me! I'll be going away for a weekend to OHIO with my ppls (KC-my main girl, Brett-My best friend, Tom-My heart, Bill-my dawg for life, and Aaron-aka: Big A.D.-My favorite person)!Imma have 2 much fun..its either that or Imma sleep till kingdom come!

Yea and your girl is gettin some colored contacts! Yes, Jaz, I have decided to get tha gray ones...but dont worry Imma let you borrow my old one! hehehehehehe! Yep. So those contacts will cost me a nice $80. I swear 'fore Lord! Being grown is NOT CHEAP! "This S*** is F****** Ludicrous! F****** Outrageous! Gosh!"-Willie Stevenson (this is my nigga rite here!)

SO I think that about cover my life in tha past month. Well at least thats a brief synopsis of it. I would appreciate some comments so I konw if anybody really even READS this thing! LOL! I missed yall tho 4real! I'll Holla! paz.100


Tuesday, December 27, 2005

Currently Listening
Lyfe 268-192
By Lyfe Jennings
.::*~*Must Be Nice*~*::.
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Hey, too much has gone down in my life to bring it all back up. All I can say is: Pray for my family...I lost my aunt...she was my Second Mama. I Love you mama, and I miss you somethin awful!

R.I.P. ~ Jennifer Poirtier

On a lighter note...I have changed dramatically, well at least I think I have. In the past few months have established that me being the naturally, kind hearted, caring, nurturing person that I am has brought me nothing but pain, hurt, and loneliness. If you know me, you know that if I love a person I love HARD. If I say I love somebody Imma love you 4ever...no matter what. I can't let go of love like others do. Even if u and I stop being close...Imma love u. Thats just the way it is. But I have come to the conclusion that I can't show that ish no more! It seems every person I love goes crashing down and I will no longer set my self up for pain.

Y is it so easy to love some one but so hard to find someone to love you? Y is it so much easier for one person to freely love bu so hard for others to freely love back? My dream and waking wish to collide with someone who actually has the capacity to love me the way I will love them. Not gonna happen. I sound like one of my close friends who says, "I don't believe in True Love." I don't believe it's for me. I just dont think its out there.

As I was saying to one of my closest friends...Sometimes I just don't think livin this life is worth it. I mean is being saved really worth all this?! I am sick and tired of feeling empty and being alone. Lemme let yall in on a little secret...For the first time in my life I understand Holiday Depression. I have never been so depressed. ALL I yearn for is to be held by someone special. Nothing more. Nothing less. And I aint talkin my dang Family! God! Why is this ish happening?!

**Sigh**

Enough complaining...Yall pray for me and my issues.Pray for my Cousin Cessy, since it was her mama that died. And I think my largest prayer request yet is this: PRAY FOR THE LOST. Those who are strayed from Christ. Pray that they come back home.     paz.100


Friday, December 23, 2005

Currently Listening
God's Son
By Nas
* I CAN*
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Ay yall, I know its been a while since I put out anything..but I REALLY don't have time to talk to yall right now, so Imma leave this entry up here for yall to read. I know its long, but its worth reading. I got this off my boy Yuguru's page...if yall was wonderin. ENJOY!

The Making of a Thug

  The BlackList Digest. Written by Minister Paul Scott.    

  In dealing with the patience that it took to deal with those brothers who

  were less culturally aware during the Black Power Era of the 60's,

  someone said that "every Negro is a potential Black man." In the 21st

  century; "The Afrikan Power Era" our slogan should be "every Thug is a

  potential Afrikan."

  It is imperative that we look at this Thug/gangsta image that has been

  held up as the essence of "black manhood" and more importantly the

  ramifications that it has for Black men, Black women and most

  importantly, Black children.

  If we trace the creation of the "Thug" we must, of course, start with the

  destruction of the black masculinity during the African Holocaust

  (transatlantic slave trade.) Before the Africans were brought here bound

  in chains, they had been stripped of their manhood through an intense

  "seasoning" process, the horrors of which have never been fully realized

  by this society. Upon arrival to America, the enslaved African was

  treated like one of the animals of the field and was used for two

  purposes labor and "breeding." It has been recorded that many Black men

  were lynched right in front of their pregnant wives so the fear that she

  felt would be transferred into the unborn child. It is also said that

  the slave owner would sometimes snatch a black woman away from her

  husband in the middle of the night and make the husband watch as he

  brutally raped her; further stripping him of his masculinity.

  After the end of "physical" slavery instead of declining, the attack on

  black manhood intensified as the white man never would forget to "put the

  black man in his place" by constantly regarding him as "boy" regardless

  of the age. That is why we have so many "men' behaving as "boys" today.

  Later during the Civil Rights era while the emphasis should have been on

  regaining our manhood and culture, the mainstream Civil Rights groups

  concentrated heavily on sharing a toilet or a lunch counter with white

  folks. One of the main failures of the Civil Rights Movement was focusing

  on integration instead of the social, economic and spiritual empowerment

  of the Black community. We bent over backwards to love white folks while

  all the while hating our black selves.

  We made an attempt to recapture our Black manhood during the Black Power

  Era of the late 60's and early 70's but that was quickly crushed by

  COINTELPRO and other attempts by the white power structure to make sure

  the transformation from boys to men would never take place.

  All of this has led to an internalized anger which, when coupled with the

  conscious or subconscious fear of white power, has produced the Thug

  image of today. Where the fear was too great to challenge white

  supremacy, head on, a pseudo-culture was created which allowed the Black

  man to let out his aggression without becoming a threat to the white

  power structure. It has also given him the ability to search for self

  respect in material things, clothing with the name of a white man on the

  label or gold medallions. The MEDIA (MisEducation Destroying Intelligent

  Afrikans) has been a willing ally in this endeavor with the movies that

  have degraded the black man from the pimp/player roles in the black

  exploitation movies of the early 70's ( Super Fly, the Mack) to the

  gangsta flix of the late 80's to the present (Menace to Society, Belly

  etc)

  The effect on the black community has been devastating. The reason that

  you have 30-something year old men acting like teenagers is because thug

  life has no age limit.

  When I was a rebellious teen we would laugh at anyone over 21 still

  "trying to be down" Because the bad boy image was seen as something that

  kids did. Today, every other song on the radio is about grown men trying

  to be Thugs/gangsters as if that is something to be proud of. Some of

  the rappers have sons that carry the same Thug image as their fathers

  (Lil Romeo and Master P) There is something very wrong with that.

  Recently, I listened to a sister on the radio telling the DJ how she

  needed a man with a "little Thug in him." It is sad that while the

  sisters of previous generations wanted a man to give her R-E-S-P-E-C-T,

  some of our less conscious sisters today want a man to treat them

  thuggishly.

  We are currently raising a generation of young people that has no sense

  of black culture outside of the Thug culture. When asked to name two

  black men who "died for the struggle" instead of naming Malcolm X and

  Fred Hampton they will tell you quickly Tupac Shakur and the Notorious

  B.I.G. Or if ask them the meaning of political prisoner they will say

  "Yeah, that's what they tried to do to Puff Daddy."

  What our community is missing is a complete analysis of the Thug Life

  phenomenon in the context of the Afrikan Liberation Struggle. We cannot

  let the "fear of blaming the white man for all our problems" or the fear

  of "preaching hate" prevent us from giving our people a correct

  historical analysis of the condition of Afrikan people. We must give our

  young people a sense of culture. We must remove the red and blue

  bandannas from the heads of our children and replace them with the

  Afrikan Liberation colors of red, black and green. We must replace their

  gang signs with Black Power fists raised proudly in the air. We must

  replace Black self hate with black love for all black people, We must

  replace the desire to be a Thug with the desire to be a strong Afrikan

  man fighting for the liberation of his people.


Tuesday, December 13, 2005

Currently Watching
Envy (Widescreen Edition)
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Ok, K.C.! So you got jokes?! Just for that Imma do this dang Tag thang now!

Ground Rules: The first player of this game starts with the topic "5 weird habits of yourself" and people who get tagged need to write a xanga entry about their 5 weird habits as well as state the rule clearly.  In the end, you need to choose the next 5 people to be tagged and list their names.  Don't forget to leave a comment that says "you are tagged" in their xanga and tell them to read yours.

O ma Lord, I can't BELIEVE I'm doin this ish!

NUMBA ONE: Sometimes when I drive I pretend to be in a music video! O I think Imma cry!

Hi this is Greg!

Anyways.....

NUMBA TWO: I can't cook rice

NUMBA THREE: I clean my nails constantly...even when they arent dirty.

NUMBA FOUR: I shave the hair off the back of my hands and fingers

NUMBA FIVE: When I'm mad at a person I forget within 24 hours

Alfight thats enough of that! I didnt really have much to say but I'm sure yall got a kick outta that. Now lets see...5 ppl...

*Niqueybaby*------*tcube*-------*Brett*------*Jas*--------*Chirstinie*

Aight yall! I'm out! paz.100



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